There was a lot of blog discussion yesterday on comparing yourself to others...and how to NOT compare yourself to others...but I just didn't agree with the popular concensus, so I am reposting my response here on my own blog:
This is only my personal opinion and how I deal with comparisons based on what I have studied:
We all know it is difficult to avoid comparing ourselves to others. There is a reason for that! The Communications Major in me is peeping out to say that it is natural to compare yourself to others…it’s how we as humans develope personal constructs in order to learn about and understand the world around us. So it’s not necessarily helpful to stop comparing yourself to others, it’s more helpful to identify why the comparison is upsetting you, and deal with that emotion effectively. Then you will be more easily able to apply the comparison to your own life, or let it go without it eating away at you.
My advise therefore is not to focus on stopping yourself from comparing, but rather to look at WHY you are comparing, and what purpose it serves. It’s all about perspective! Look beyond the face values and keep in mind that you are an individual with a different background, set of goals, and set of values than the person you are comparing yourself to.
If someone’s running stats upset you for instance, it is important to look at WHY. Do you have an injury? Have you been focusing more on work than exercise? Have you had family issues to deal with lately? The reasons for why the comparison upset you help put it into perspective, and once you understand those reasons, you can set goals for yourself based on your own needs, and not thiers.
Be forgiving towards yourself. Use the information you have been given for a positive purpose, not a negative one. Congratulate yourself on your own personal efforts, and set obtainable goals to keep you focused. Keep in mind that your top priority might still be family, or work, or healing before working on faster runs, and that’s OKAY.
The comparisons you make are merely triggers your mind uses to try to understand the world around you and create the opportunity to change yourself for the better. Once you identify what it is you want to change, comparisons can be a valuable motivational tool.
We all know it is difficult to avoid comparing ourselves to others. There is a reason for that! The Communications Major in me is peeping out to say that it is natural to compare yourself to others…it’s how we as humans develope personal constructs in order to learn about and understand the world around us. So it’s not necessarily helpful to stop comparing yourself to others, it’s more helpful to identify why the comparison is upsetting you, and deal with that emotion effectively. Then you will be more easily able to apply the comparison to your own life, or let it go without it eating away at you.
My advise therefore is not to focus on stopping yourself from comparing, but rather to look at WHY you are comparing, and what purpose it serves. It’s all about perspective! Look beyond the face values and keep in mind that you are an individual with a different background, set of goals, and set of values than the person you are comparing yourself to.
If someone’s running stats upset you for instance, it is important to look at WHY. Do you have an injury? Have you been focusing more on work than exercise? Have you had family issues to deal with lately? The reasons for why the comparison upset you help put it into perspective, and once you understand those reasons, you can set goals for yourself based on your own needs, and not thiers.
Be forgiving towards yourself. Use the information you have been given for a positive purpose, not a negative one. Congratulate yourself on your own personal efforts, and set obtainable goals to keep you focused. Keep in mind that your top priority might still be family, or work, or healing before working on faster runs, and that’s OKAY.
The comparisons you make are merely triggers your mind uses to try to understand the world around you and create the opportunity to change yourself for the better. Once you identify what it is you want to change, comparisons can be a valuable motivational tool.
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